An effective way to cheer up when feeling sad is to engage in pleasurable activities that are within your control and which are known to have long lasting results. Unfortunately, one of the ways people commonly seek to find happiness and cheer up — shopping — has been found to be of limited benefit.
Acquiring something new does provide a lift of spirits, but the effect is short-lived. Research studies show that changes in a person's circumstances, whether by acquiring a new item of clothing or getting a big raise, have a brief impact on the person's level of happiness. People quickly adjust to changes in circumstances, even changes as dramatic as winning a lottery.
Strategies to Increase Happiness
There are, however, effective strategies people can use to cheer up which have been studied and validated by psychological researchers. How to Fight Depression, Cheer Up, Find Happiness describes the research which uncovers what many might term the secrets to happiness.
The article referenced above and others recently published on these pages introduce several strategies found to be valuable in increasing a person's average level of happiness. These strategies include:
- Counting your blessings and expressing gratitude.
- Cultivating optimism and learning to think optimistically.
- Avoiding ruminating and social comparison.
- Practicing acts of kindness.
- Nurturing and improving relationships.
- Choosing challenging and engaging activities.
- Savoring life’s joys.
More Happiness Producing Strategies
Following are two additional strategies for finding greater happiness as identified by positive psychology researcher Sonja Lyubomirsky, Ph.D. (The How of Happiness: A Scientific Approach to Getting the Life You Want New York, Penguin Press, 2008).
The Strategy of Committing to Goals
Setting and achieving goals can be very satisfying and fulfilling when properly done. Following are several important success factors in effective goal setting.
- Select Meaningful Goals – Working on goals that are meaningful is engaging. Select goals that are important to you and fill you with energy and excitement when thinking of them.
- Visualize the End Result – Allow yourself to daydream about the completed goal, seeing the end results and feeling the resulting emotions. If a goal cannot be easily visualized it may not be the right goal for you.
- Select Challenging Goals – Goals should be challenging but not overwhelming. Appropriate goals will have the right mix of challenge and alignment with skills you either have or can obtain.
For much more information on effective goal setting, see Summary of Goal Setting Activities, which summarizes and expands on effective goal setting processes and techniques.
The Strategy of Forgiveness
Forgiveness is a self help form of healing. Deciding to forgive oneself and others for past transgressions is a path to inner peace and an effective anger self-help process. Forgiveness Healing in a Personal Development Plan describes several benefits researchers attribute to forgiveness. Among these are:
- Lower blood pressure.
- Stress reduction.
- Less hostility.
- Better anger management skills.
- Healthier relationships.
- Greater religious or spiritual well-being.
- Improved psychological well-being.
How to Forgive: Writing on Psychology Today Online in "Four Elements of Forgiveness," Ryan Howes defines four elements characterizing successful acts of forgiveness:
- Express the emotion: Allow yourself to express the full emotion you felt when the act of transgression occurred. Express it openly to the transgressor if possible.
- Understand why: The mind needs to find a reason for the transgression — some explanation — even if it is only that the transgression was a random event that could have happened to anyone.
- Rebuild Safety: The forgiver must feel safe from future occurrences of the transgression. A sincere apology from the offending party accomplishes this, as does building a boundary or means of defense against similar acts.
- Let go: Letting go is a decision a forgiver makes to release a grudge, resentment, and need for revenge. Letting go is not pretending the event didn't occur, but it is deciding that it no longer will affect future thoughts or behaviors. Howes suggests that if letting go is not possible, you have insufficiently processed the previous three elements.
Practicing Forgiveness and Effective Goal Setting
Learning to forgive and to set and achieve goals effectively is now known to bring a person greater life happiness. The processes, strategies, and references in this article can be included in an ongoing personal growth plan or utilized as needed to cheer up when feeling sad.
Jerry Lopper - IPPA member, business and engineering degrees. Jerry's passion for personal development shows in 5 books, hundreds of articles & ...
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